South Park: The New Girl
by Crystal1130
Summary: What happens when a new girl comes to South Park? And what happens when she is Cartmans baby sister?
1. First Day

I wake up in my room, a room I havent seen since i was 3, so about 7 years ago. I now have to go to a new school with my big brother, Eric Cartman. I've been living with my dad in Texas and my mom and briother were in South Park, Colorado since I was born. Now its the first day of school with my brother, who im in the same grade as because is skipped a grade. " Cartman! Get up!" When Cartman finally woke up he yelled, " Bitch, get your big tits outta my face!" So i smaked him and left to get dresses. I put one my black long slived shirt, my light blue shorts, my black boots, and my purple vest hoodie. So we left to the bus stop and i faintly saw the out lines of Cartmans "friends", Stan, Kyle, and Kenny. When we finally got to the bus stop the guys started staring at me and the one named "Kenny" wasnt just starin at me he was staring at my chest, then muffeled, " Woah, Cartman, you wernt lying!" Cartman Laughed and said " Dude dont stare at my sisters chest." Then outta no where they guys interoduced themselfs, "Im Stan, and this is Kyle and he's Kenny." "Hi you guys, nice to meet you."

So, we're on the bus and I decide to sit Cartman. The guys are trying to be nice but in my family we don't like to get cozy to fast in a new enviroment so I decided to put in my headphones and just wait to get to school. Now, we're in school and i take my seat next to Kenny. Then, right when I get settled tell me to introduce myself to the class. I don't want to get in trouble so I get up and say, "Hey, I'm Christina Kerr, I'm Eric Cartman's baby sister." That was like a button of mass destruction because when I said that everyone's faces went kinda frightened, so I smiled and then added, "So, if he bothers you I'll take care of it, and if you I'll take care of you". And I said that with the biggest smile, and with that I was done so I sat at my seat with when I sat down started what they call class. Now a few hours have passed and it's time for lunch and I'm not very hungry so I pick at it for a while then gave it to Cartman. Then Stan touched my arm, "You aren't hungry at all, Crystal?" I just looked at him and said, "Not really." Then out of no where a boy my brother discribed as Butters ran up to the lunch table the me, eric, stan, kyle, kenny, token, craige, and clyde were at. Then he shouted, "Fellas! I heard a really sexy new girl just started going here!" Then he looked at the table and notised there was a girl there that he had never seen before and got an idiotic look one his face. Then he looked strait at me and said, "Youre the new girl!? Wow, youre pretty!" I just looked at him and gave him a big smile, "You must be Butters, I'm Eric Cartman's little sister, Christina."


	2. One of the Guys

So, it's after school and Cartman and the guys are going to go to some weird pizza place in town and I have to go with them. Now that we got there i go to the bathroom, because well, a girls gotta go when a girls gotta go. But when i got back I heard Cartman telling the guys about my collection of stuffed animals. So right when i got to the table i grab his fatass arm and pulled him outside and when we got outside, well i beat the shit outta him, "Cartman, you mother fucking, bitchy little prick! Dont you ever tell anyone about my stuff!" Then i grabed him and brought him inside and the guys were all like, "wow dude, you beat up Cartman!" So we just finished our pizza and stan, kyle, kenny, Cartman, and me were all walking home i looked at cartman witha smile and said, "tell mom waht i did, i dare you. I want you to see what happens, and remember when mom's late, i make the food you eat." Then Kyle started it telling cartman to whatchout because i was going to get him at night like a boogie man or something. So, i changed the subject, "kyle, cartman tells me your a jew." And in saying that i heard kyle under his breath say, "oh,no." So, i just gave him a smile and a big thums up, "good for you, without judaism there would be no christianity." Then I think Kyle was blushing then, Cartman gave me a smug look and said, "Nuhuh! Jews killed Jesus!" I looked at him like he was an idiot, " uhg, Cartman, Jesus is and was a jew you idiot." Then the funniest thing happened cartman whent on his knees and yelled, "NOOOOOOO!" It was pretty awsome, i think I'm really starting to fit in South Park.

It's time to wake for my second day of being at South Park Elementry. Also, today I'm going over to Kyle's house. I can't wait because I want to meet his Jersey Jew mother, I think she's going to be epic. Also, Kyle said he has a baby brother in 1st grade, Ike. I bet he going to be so cute. All right, back to school, I think it's pretty boring because I get all A's without really trying. And now I have to wake up Cartman, again. So this time, I'm going to make some pancakes, bacon, eggs, and donuts for breakfast. And I was right, I heard him ripping down the stairs but when I saw him in his Pjs, so I told him to put on his clothes for school or he doesn't get to eat breakfast, but what he doesn't know is by the time he gets back downstairs I would've eaten all of the food. Now we're walking to the bus stop and I look at Cartman and say, "Don't be so angry, Mister Grumpy Tub-Tub." So now we're at the bus stop with the guys and Kyle stupidly asks, "What's wrong, Fatass?" So in saying that, Cartman with all his rage yells, "MAYBE IT'S BECAUSE ALL YOU STUPID JEWS STEAL ALL OUR FOOD!" And Kyle looks at him like he was the most stupidest person in the world and said, "Cartman, Jews don't steal peoples' food." And with that, Cartman looked right at Kyle and pointed straight at me and said, "But she said Jews stole all of our food." Kyle looked at me and asked, "Why did you say that?" I just looked at him blankly and didn't answer. Now we're at school. And I can't wait for it to be over, because I still want to meet Kyle's mom. So I looked to the clock and it's almost time to go, and I've noticed that we ride to school on a bus but we walk home. So we start walking off to Kyle's house, we get inside, and we sit down on the couch. Then out of nowhere, a petite, plump, ginger woman walks into the living room and says, "Oh Bubbie, is this the girl you've been talking about?" I just looked at her like what she said was kind of weird and then I looked at Kyle and Kyle looked at his mom and said, "Mom, you're embarrassing me in front of my friends." And she replied with, "But Bubbala, you talked about her like she was kind of angel or something, you always call her pretty and Ike really wants to meet her. Let me go and get him." So I felt kind of embarrassed, a whole family likes me before I get to meet them. Then I looked at Kyle and said, "So, like an angel, and pretty? You're so sweet," And I'm not sure, but I think he blushed. Then, a cute little Canadian boy around the age of six or so just ran down the stairs and looked at me and said 'Hi'. It was so cute, I love little kids. So in saying that we all sit on the couch and started watching movies until we all had to go home.

Out of no where while im sleeping i get a gibrate on my phone, so i wake up and answer it. Wow its stan, and hes asking me to come down to my basement, is he in my basement? Creepy! But i get up and go down to the basement, at 11:00 at night! When i got down there i couldnt belive what i saw, a bunch of 11 year olds in superhero costume, nerd alert! So i asked the dreaded question, "Why are you guys in hero costumes?" Cartman walked up to me and said, "Why are you in your pj's?!" I looked at him and said, "It's 11:00 at night!" Then they had the nerve to look at me like i was waring a stupid costume! How dare those stupid, fucking nerds, making ME feel embarresed! So i looked at the 'coon and friends' with an angry embaressed blush and said, "FINE! YOU GUYS WANT ME TO DRESS LIKE A SUPERHERO I WILL!" So i went upstairs got on my black sports bra, my black short shorts, and my balck mask and boots, and yes i have alot of black stuff. And when i got down stairs Cartman, or should i say 'coon' grab me and said, "Alright Hoe, you're now a part of Coon and friends." How did i get into this?


	3. Coon and Friends

It's a beginning of a new chapter in my life, I'm running around with my nerdy friends and my big brother in a superhero outfit the only good part about this is that Kenny's superhero voice, it's the sexiest thing ever! I can't belive how sexy Kenny, i mean Mysterions voice is! Oh no, im getting fangirly! Anyway like Kenny i have a power, i can see ghosts and kinda read the future. Yes, i know what you're thinking, 'stop lying, mediums aren't real' well, shut up! Because im as real as real can get buddy! So, we're spending an awesome friday night sitting waiting for crime. I just thought I'd put a thought out there, " if you want to fight crime, create it." They looked at me as if i just suggested to kill some one, belive me i love Kenny but i think I'd kill him, he'd just be back the next day. So i said the only thing i could, "what?" Carman walked up to me and said, "What the fuck is wrong with you? Are you a Coon and Friends or a Coon and Enemy?" My face turned confused and i just stared at him then the guys blankly. "Um, sorry i guess? I don't know what i was thinking, sitting in a room full of stink guys in hero costumes is fun." Then with that i put on a sarcastic smile. "Lets wait to see what crime happens."


End file.
